While You Whores Were Singing Kumbaya, I Got Attacked by a Crazed Esthetician.

With all the excitement and live-blogging and re-capping of BlogHer 08, its easy to overlook the less-than-thrilling things that were going on outside of San Fran this weeked. I hear there was a BlogHer pity party, but I missed it. The Queen of Shake-Shake was missing in action due to her attendance of ShagHer 08. (Color me green with envy, the bitch performed so well she’s getting paid for it.)  Neil Kramer hosted BlogHim 08, which I hear was a smashing success, despite lack of sponsors, venue, or attendees. I did get to catch up with Neil and Sarcastic Mom on Twitter Saturday evening, and we had a rather lively discussion about boob-grabbing, so the weekend wasn’t a total wash.

That said, the one thing I could have totally done without this weekend was the trip I took Saturday afternoon to get a haircut. You see, while you guys were attending BlogHer, BlogHim, parties, and everything else, I was busy getting half my eyebrow ripped off by a crazed esthetician.

No, seriously, she really did rip off half my eyebrow.

eyebrow ripped off

See that big bare spot to the left of my eye? There used to be brow there. Brow that matches the other side, which I still have. Not that the crazy bitch didn’t attempt to shorten that one too, and at one point have the nerve to comment on how short one of them was. “No worries” she tells me, “They told us in school its normal for them to grow differently!”. I assume by grow differently, she meant AFTER she accidently spread the wax too far and attempted to scalp my face?

Too add insult to injury, the hair place could not figure out how to do a refund on a service. It’s never a good sign when they say “Oh, corporate told us we aren’t supposed to do services anymore.”

Umm, gee, wonder why??????

So now I have to go through the whole 800 number mess to try to get a refund on a wax they apparently weren’t even supposed to be doing.

I realize I’ve not been blogging as much as I should lately, but when I ask the universe for inspiration, how about next time we go a little easier? I would have settled for a “BlogHer 09-bound!” post ;)

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    20 Comments

    1. I think you would be the perfect producer for the BLOGTHEM 09 conference.. You could feature Eyebrow Waxing Do’s and Don’ts Workshops..How to Pluck the Nose-hairs from Customer Service Agents on 800#’s…. And a verity of other more practical Real Life things Real People have to deal with .

    2. Neil says:

      Maybe you will start a new fashion trend. You can call it “Nude Brow” to make it sound sexier.

    3. Mrs. Who says:

      OH, honey, we have all been there. I had some crazy bitch of a wax lady take way too much off in the center so that, for several weeks, I had kind of a snake-y look, my eyebrows were so far apart. Thank heavens it mostly grew back.

    4. OMG! Never mind a refund, you should have been able to reciprocate!

    5. Rachael says:

      I wish I could think of something witty, but I can’t stop staring at what the wax-happy woman did to your eye brow. They BETTER give you a refund.

    6. J says:

      I like Mrs. Schmitty’s idea. ;)

      Looks like maybe you’ll be drawing it in for awhile? Seems like if the salon sells make up (many do) they could comp you some brow corrector. Idiots.

    7. Summer says:

      Ouch! I hope you get a refund and a big, fat certificate for some free hair care.

    8. Diane says:

      oh dear.
      I am sorry but you are officially kicked out of the Gap mom group now.
      I hope you shaved hers off.

    9. Oh, WTF? There is NO excuse for not giving you your money back when someone rapes your face like that. You shouldn’t have to do any work to get it back! I think I may have just walked out on them. Hah.

      Here’s hoping your brow hair grows back soon.

      Still. I’d burn down the building.

    10. Jess says:

      OUCH Did you kick her? Please tell me you kicked her.

    11. Amy@UWM says:

      Ooooh. Totally sorry. Better get very friendly with an eyebrow pencil stat.

    12. I think the gods of good grooming are ignoring everyone who didn’t attend BlogHer. I was at BlogHere instead and my eyebrows were a mess. Also, my hair looked like ass because it was 102 degrees.

    13. BrianW says:

      Hopefully you get a full refund without having to jump through too many hoops.

      You could try to have some fun with it by acting nutty in public or make sure you look at people at an angle with squinty eyes. It keeps things fun by acting quirky in public for no real reason.

      Hope it grows back soon though.

    14. I once went to for a bikini wax and was fantastically shocked when she proceeded to contort me in ways I’ve only seen in porn movies and give me a “Brazilian.” Of course I didn’t have to walk around with no pants on so…you win.

    15. Natalie says:

      Ummm ouch, but those hairs are like whiskers and will have NO problem growing back!

    16. oh no! This is the exact reason I have never plucked my eyebrows….although I do need a haircut somthing fierce! Oh, and I wasn’t at blogher this weekend either. boo. next year hopefully.

    17. That woman deserves to have one of her eyebrows ripped off, too. And tell them that you’re a famous blogger and if you don’t get AT LEAST a refund, you will share the name of the salon and the esthetician with your readers. . . and we’ll share it on our blogs, and so on.

    18. I wish I could have attended Blogher, maybe next year.
      Ouch. I wouldn’t have been able to handle that. No plucking for me.

    19. Gidge says:

      I once had over half an eyebrow removed at a REALLY expensive spa……the SECOND he ripped off the cloth he said “uh-oh” and then”oh dear”.

      And with that look, I started my new job.

    20. Karen says:

      I too feel your pain–I assumed my stylist knew WTH SHE WAS DOING
      but, NO! I had a very tender lid where she spilled some extra wax. She immediately started making excuses. That did it for me–I fired her! Her lie and cover-up lost her my business–she had cut my hair for 6 mo. before that painful lesson. Poor Gidge–I am wincing at the idea of having to go to a new job looking less than your best…

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    1. [...] (Although I *have* gone back to doing my own waxing after the great Eyebrow Debacle of 2008.) [...]

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