Aug30
Open Sphincter, Remove Head.
Every so often over the last few weeks, I have gotten that nagging little voice in my head saying “You haven’t blogged in awhile. Maybe you should get a post up?” A quick bitch-slap and the voice shuts up right quick, but looking at my last post 25 days ago makes me think I really should have been paying the voice a bit more attention. 25 days without blogging, and it wasn’t even an intentional hiatus. WTF?????
I don’t know how to really explain it, other than that with the stress of the divorce going on, I began having issues with my depression again, only a bit worse than I have had in the past. I became moody, avoided friends, stayed out of social situations as much as possible and generally began to shut down. In addition to the depression and anxiety I’ve experienced before, I began having panic attacks as well. Overall, I was a bit of a mess. I finally realized one day that I was having a hard time doing even just the day-to-day stuff, and that’s when I knew I was once again in need of a bit of pharmaceutical help.
One doctor’s appointment, a Zoloft prescription, and two weeks later I am finally feeling like a real human being again. I’m not 100%, but I’ve left behind the constant moodiness, the crying, the panic attacks, and the complete and total lack of energy. (When doing nothing more than taking a shower is both overwhelming and exhausting, you know things are bad.)
As I am feeling better, I’m pulling my head out of my ass and looking at the things that I have been neglecting. Writing has always been therapy for me, and my friends in the blogging community (yes you, dear readers) have rarely been anything but supportive. If I had been in the right frame of mind I might have realized I should have been more open with everyone about what was going on. I’ve seen very little of my friends lately, although I got to spend some time with a couple of them this week and that was really awesome. (Thank you so much for being there!) I’ve had a couple of opportunities come up with my writing that could lead to some cool stuff, although nothing large-scale, yet (Glass half full here..) , so hoping I’ve not missed out on those. In short, I’m back in action, but picking up all those balls I dropped over the last few weeks. Let’s hope I didn’t lose any.
I’ve missed you guys, so do me a favor and let me know what I’ve missed this month. Link your best recent post in my comments so I can swing by and catch up. I promise we’ll be seeing each other more often 
All new readers are welcome, and I hope you will consider subscribing to my RSS feed. Feeling sociable? Join me on Twitter, I'd love to hear from you!
If you liked this, you might enjoy:
- Making My Escape to SOBcon 2008!
- I Am Speechless…And THIS is Why I Wrote About Depression.
- One Step Forward, Two Steps Back
15 Responses to “Open Sphincter, Remove Head.”
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Kara Aug 30th 2008 at 05:48 pm 1
There have been days when I’ve wondering how I would survive without Zoloft…
Hope to see more from you soon. *hugs*
Christy Aug 30th 2008 at 06:02 pm 2
Welcome back! I am glad you are feeling better and I am so glad you are feeling more sociable!
Candace (Mama Luxe) Aug 30th 2008 at 06:05 pm 3
Nice to see you posting–sorry to hear about some of the stress in your life, but glad to hear you are doing better. If you come by you’ll see I’m 41 weeks, 3 days, with a suspected huge baby. That’s the news in my part of the blogosphere.
Mrs. Schmitty Aug 30th 2008 at 06:27 pm 4
Hey, don’t apologize…you’ve been going through an ordeal. Glad to see you are back!
catnip Aug 30th 2008 at 06:59 pm 5
I’m glad to hear you’re feeling better. It sounds like taking an unexpected blog break was just one of those things you needed.
Best recent post? ha! I got nothing. I think I would have been better off taking a break than posting all that crap.
Devilish Southern Belle Aug 30th 2008 at 08:11 pm 6
Glad you are feeling a bit better now. Depression sucks. I haven’t actually been up to much in the past 25 days, so I am not sure if I have a ‘best post’. I’ve just been incredibly busy with the kids and “life stuff”, and I have joined roller derby again.
Try to blog and come around more often!
sam {temptingmama} Aug 30th 2008 at 08:16 pm 7
Welcome back!! I’ve been thinking about you a lot! I hope you’re back for GOOD now!
*hugs*
The Fashionable Housewife Aug 30th 2008 at 08:33 pm 8
I’ve heard nothing but good things about Zoloft. I need ot get me some of that stuff…
Krista Aug 30th 2008 at 10:53 pm 9
Glad you’re back, we’ve missed your sarcastic brand of humor…
My last post was about our new Sonic… we’ve never had one before! come see!
J Aug 30th 2008 at 11:22 pm 10
So glad you’re back, and that you’re getting through this ok. I’ve been wondering, and hoping you’re ok. Best of luck.
Paul OFlaherty Aug 31st 2008 at 07:03 am 11
Welcome back kiddo
Shamelessly Sassy Aug 31st 2008 at 04:24 pm 12
It’s nice to see you blogging again!
Jessica (from It's my life...) Aug 31st 2008 at 04:29 pm 13
Welcome back. I’m sorry things have been so rough these last few weeks, but I’m glad that you’re feeling better!
Jamie E Sep 1st 2008 at 11:24 pm 14
Glad to see you back. Hang in there and do what you can. Don’t push yourself too hard. I will take what you have to give.
Emily Sep 21st 2008 at 10:32 am 15
Meds are awesome. I am on some good shit and have finally assimilated!